But, is it nothing to know when you are dying, when you are about to take leave of this world, of its joys and sorrows, when the past of your life is unfurled before you, when eternity opens wide its portals, is it nothing to know at that last awful,supreme moment of your lives, that you have not lived in vain, that you have lived for the benefit of others, that you have lived to help in the cause of your country's regeneration?

-Surendranath Banerjea

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Alive

I'd been away for a while..and so will i be again after this lull..I wanted to call it a siesta..but i literally had the siesta even before i ate..Pun apart,I was finally into corporate world joining the league of those infinite poor innocent  souls waiting for the month end for the pay slip..

I'd been a day-schii throughout my life..hostels were not something i liked,coz i appreciated a bit of privacy and a lot of freedom..hostels provided neither..And to someone who had never been away from the home,the comfort zone,this definitely was 'an experience'..Howsoever people lauded the combination of money with freedom when it came to working somewhere away from the hometown,there are times,when your mind reiterates the fact that there's nowhere on earth more heavenly than the home..there's no one on earth more caring than the parents..

It's just been a fortnight since i joined,and it already feels like years..I missed my home like hell..Not that i had any worries there,but it's just like that..i missed my mom,my dad,bro..my room,pc,.my courtyard..my honda activa..my friends..What not..How i wished every morning,to find myself wake up out of just a dream,into the real world being my home,which obviously was just a hope hopen..To even think that i would be in a place where i wouldn't see my dad and mom get back home tired from the office,or to find my bro snoring before the heap of books,or to find myself busily smsing a friend was all hurtful..Every evening i wished for that cup of coffee my mom gave..and those cookery shows i performed at home..and those long enlightening discussions with my dad on topics varying from current ones to personal stuffs..and those wacky talks with my bro on his crush..

I knew this was life..This was how it was destined to be,and this was my time to earn,and accomplish all those long cherished dreams in life..But the emotional self keeps peeping out..I might sound weird or crazy or soppy..May be i am..Life is a bigger picture than just a courtyard or a cup of tea..but I still find it difficult..even with those friends around,and even with those 5 star facilities i'm provided with,all i wish for is,an endless today,so that my diwali holidays don't end,and i don't need to return tomo..

PS:I know this is nothing more than a short sulking post..do bear with me,if not empathize..

Note:Life is good as of now but for these bouts of home-sickness..I'm kinda in an isolated world where laptops are not allowed..and the company provides a net which has almost all those useful sites,(to be read as gmail,yahoo,facebook,orkut,twitter,blogger) blocked..And hence i can by no means read your blogs until i find some proxy..So I apologize for my absence!!

Khuda Hafiz
~Gayathri~

15 comments:

ZB said...

It happens...all the times...it happened to me after 12th STD....and suddenly my world changed....it hurt initially...but thats the way life is....u got to fend for urself...all the best....welcome to real world my dear.:))

sujata said...

A hostel always does a world of good to an individual whos never stayed away from home, its a hands on course on life...live it up babe!!!

Rahil said...

always wanted a hostel life...but it seems like grass is always greener on the other side..!!

To your blog after long time..had my exams, so how are u??

Dhanya said...

I experienced that feeling in the one year that I was in hostel.. but my ma felt uneasy and made me a day scholar from next year :D It's just the way life is... if not now, then later on we will have to face all this...

Neha said...

I had lived in a hostel for a year, and I loved it...well i did feel home-sick sometimes, but I was very lucky to have found amazing friends there...hope ur days out thr pass by soon, or at least the proxies in office work more often...

gayathri-vishwanathan said...

Welcome to the corporate world...i am sure u will get over this homesickness in a few days...this stage of life will surely make u independent and strong willed. But yes please do ensure that u dont become hard hearted. Some people do tend to become that way over a period of time.

Happy Diwali (belated i.e.)

HaRy!! said...

welcome to the corp world matey! :D, no wonder Gayathri dissappeared for a looong time eh!..fair enuf..get used to it...same with my company here...but am lucky that am able to read blogs of my blogger friends at least!..rest of all the entertainment stuff is blocked...yeah home sickness is lingering along for more than a year now!! tc...wish to c yu soon!

Thousif Raza said...

you run away whenever you have holiday, or am i the only one who knows that secret? :P, but jokes apart i know how you feel cause i too am in the same city, but as your pals live in another state thats a whole different story all together, my sympathies for that, but experiance accha hota hai yaar na?, temme abt it all next time, and blog visit karna mat bhoolna ok :)


take care and keep writing.........

Amrit said...

It always happens initially. But this is so much fun. When I left my home to move to a borading school, I was in 6th Standard. It was difficult for me and I took so much time to get over that lonliness and home-sickness. And now tts been 14 years I have been staying away in hostels, rented apartments with frnds, Paying Guests!!!

It is so much fun> I am sure you will get used to it and will start liking it. Just keep hanging there for sometime.

Hope you new job is treating you good. Wish you all the best for your new endeavour!

And I never realized that you started disliking my blog so much that you took me out of your blogroll! :(

Ninoy said...

http://engtech.wordpress.com/2006/10/04/how-to-access-gmail-when-its-blocked-at-work-or-school/

try the gmail lite.. used to work in the tight ass I-bank . shud in ur place i hope

Destiny's child... said...

Hmm...though i have never been in a hostel can empathise with you...the very thought of shifting to another place for my PG gives me the creeps...
Look at the brighter sde, you can spend your own money! Buy stuff etc etc!
Keep smiling :)

Zeba said...

I live in a hostel and your post didn't make me feel very good about it!!

Congrats though... Hope coming days are more fun for you!! Maybe AFTER you get your pay check!!!

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