But, is it nothing to know when you are dying, when you are about to take leave of this world, of its joys and sorrows, when the past of your life is unfurled before you, when eternity opens wide its portals, is it nothing to know at that last awful,supreme moment of your lives, that you have not lived in vain, that you have lived for the benefit of others, that you have lived to help in the cause of your country's regeneration?

-Surendranath Banerjea

Tuesday, October 14, 2008


But for you,
I would never have felt love.
If not for you,
I would never have endured rejection.
You drove me to the zenith,
and then plunged me into the abyss.

You were the tenor of my life..
The nub n pith of my existence..
And when you were gone,
it was not just you,
but my demure self,
my love n affection,
that left me.
Never did i ever know,
I could love someone so much..

It's not my smile,
but my facade that you see,
for you read the curve in my lips,
and not the tears in the squinted eyes..
Perhaps,I never showed,
in the fear of pricking you,
hurting you.

What you left in me,
was nothing but a black hole..
and i kept on digging myself into it,
in search of you,.
in search of my lost self..

I'm shuddered,
out of my reverie.
And all that is left with me,
is the shards of my dreams,
my hopes and euphoria..

Days passed..
Months passed..
Never did i find a day,
without your thoughts..
Never did i sleep a wink,
without you peeping in my dreams..
I was set to miss you a great deal,
but i miss you more than that,
for it's not just you,
but my self that i lost.

Never did i love and adore someone so much..
Never did i respect and admire someone so much..

Neither your absence,
nor your silence,
would bring me back my senses,
for,they are lost..
Lost forever..

Never did i love someone so much..
Never will i ever..

Disclaimer:This is nothing but crazy musings and is not bound to interrogation..!!

Khuda Hafiz

Tuesday, October 7, 2008


World is spinning in an unprecedented pace,.leaving everyone off-guard.. Technically speaking,it must have been like,the earth has stopped spinning,for spinning is what it does always..and it's the state of repose that brings about chaos on the globe..no atmosphere,no ambient environment,no magnetic field,..
I'm sorry,but geology is not my forte,.neither was my intention to blabber the geological gibberish..

Nevertheless,it is bedlam on the globe,.Every imaginable luke and corner of the earth seems to be shuddered in a pandemonium..The collapse of the financial giants of the US had been a blindsided ambush pelting hard on the continent..What is disgusting the most is the fact that the havoc is the ramifications of a sordid greed on the part of the fiscal monsters that boosted up the real-estate sector of the US resulting in every tom,dick and harry getting hold of a billion worth castle without a collateral security nor an income certificate or stable job even..And the most hilarious of all snippets is that,we see the emergence of a new creed of people in the US which are nothing but the home-less middle class who are bound to seek shelter in their cars or the like..

It wouldn't have been a matter of interest lest the crash was confined to the international policeman..unfortunately enough,it seems precariously contagious and has already tightened its paws in almost all parts of the world..The EU has made its share of collapse as well..

Owing to the fact that a major flake of our financial institutions are in the public sector,India could manage to squirm free from the claws of financial breakdown..yet,the sensex has been plummeting steadily.. Albeit the financial sector is still safe,the IT sector which concentrated on the services in the monetary sector has met with a head-on collision already leaving one hell of Indian Professionals jobless..

Letting apart the global affairs and getting back home,we find an even more discomfiting state of affairs..
The ever upheld tag of secularism and communal harmony of the nation is revealing itself to be a brittle and fragile shroud which could easily be disrupted..With all those communal tensions in Orissa between the Hindus and the Christians continuing relentlessly snatching and plundering the lives and even more precious aspects of the innocents,matters are worsening as it reaches a fork which is attributed to the proclamation of culpability of the assassination of a hindutva leader by the maoists and the staggering revelation of the fact that the culprits were not merely the materialistic maoists but those practicing christianity..

The communal tension flares up to set the dry forests of Assam on fire with the Bodos and the Muslims fighting,for what is still obscure to me..

When one part of the country is paralyzed with the communal tensions,there's yet another hemorrhage startling the nation which is nothing but the terrorist attacks..We had been quarried by the terrorists since early '90's although the attacks in Kashmir even before 90's were left unnoticed..But what's most effing is the fact that there's an escalating trend of Indian born and brought-up educated youth turning against the nation in the brand of a shadowy Indian Mujahuddeen,hierarchy of which is still veiled, for reasons of alienation or insecurity or injustice or some f***..vindications apart,effect remains the same..and till date they have proved themselves invincible in clouting the nation at the major cities and centers of economic development..It's unquestionable that the IM is not truly Desi,especially owing to the jihadi training for the pawns from Pakistan and the like..And it is still obscure if it is the ostensible reasons of alienation or insecurity which is spearheading the spiraling terrorism or the rising pro-American attitude or it is yet another jihadi ploy to bring about total havoc in the so-called upcoming world power..

Amid all these turmoil,and the unrelenting 12.something inflation rate that squeezes a layman,the UPA govt still makes it to the N-deal leaving the common mob still dubious about the state of India being at the receiving end of a one-sided contract..all we can do at this moment is to wait and see if it's gonna be a hasty decision bound to regret on retrospect..

In spite of the pandemonium across the globe,life still moves on..Zindegi Migzara..

Khuda Hafiz